Now as I look at Rob curled up in the fetal position still regaining strength from his awesome lead, I am far from brimming with enthusiasm for the task at hand. I finally pull myself together and make my way up the overhanging corner above, pulling on multiple pieces of gear in the process. Due to abysmal rack management, I have to climb the last 20 feet of 5.10+ crack with no gear while fighting atrocious rope drag. If this pitch is truly only 5.11, then most of the other climbs we’ve done on this trip are 5.9. I crumple onto the belay ledge an exhausted wreck. Rob has to wait for 15 minutes while I put together an anchor. Once I have him on belay, he somehow manages to fire the pitch clean, keeping our record of free ascents intact. 

We simul the last several pitches at a very slow pace and when I top out I simply keep walking, finally belaying Rob off the fencepost next to the car.  Disintegrating in the parking lot, we both know that we’ve given every last ounce of energy we have. Rob somehow gets us back to Eagle in one piece as pass out in the back. 

Sitting at home a week later nursing my throbbing knee, it’s hard to put into words what I feel. People have asked me to rank the climbs we did. They each stand out in their own right for different reasons. Every one of them would be a worthwhile destination by itself. Astro Dog is by far the hardest.  Astro Monkey is the shortest, while Astroman has the most consistent climbing. Shune’s provides 2 of the best pitches in all of the desert, and Cloud Tower offers plain, simple fun. While hanging out at the Two Boulder Bivy on Astro Dog, Brad and Andy just shook their heads in disbelief as we told them about our adventure. One of them suggested that we write an article describing the Astro Tour, saying that it could turn in to a modern testpeice for the truly masochistic climber. 

Get yourself a decent set of wheels, a strong partner, and a week off from work and you too can experience the World Series, the Final Four, the Indy 500, the Tour de France, and the Super Bowl all in the course of 7 days.  If two average Joe’s with full time jobs can pull it off, you too can climb the best that our sport has to offer. After all, with a name like Astro, it has to be good! 

Mike Brumbaugh lives with his wife Jennifer in Eagle, CO, where he has easy access to I-70.  His secret to climbing success is to recruit partners who are far stronger than he is.  He figures he will sleep when he is dead.