Our friends Yves, Sacha and Kuba are like mythical creatures, immortal men. Very strong, tall, talented and skilled in all arts. They invited us to a special mountain oasis and taught us special new skills. We were taken by helicopter to the Petit Combat, and forced to follow their lead as an ancient rite of passage, weaving though crevasses, starting small avalanche, and marking the fresh snow with snake like lines, intended as a gift to the great Hawk. We were on top of the world for the first time in our lives, and awed by the grandeur and prowess of Grand Combat, and other massive snowy rocky, icy mountains.

Some say they are the Old Ones, creatures sleeping now, but who once walked the earth, singing and being merry, living and basking in glory as rulers of the planet. We were skeptical, but we tried to be open in the mind and heart, and we passed on. Living through our skiing adventure, our friends BASE-jumped to celebrate, and we went on to the festivities of climbing, eating, partying, dancing, talking, smoking, and sleeping. In our new city we were okay. Calm returned to our hearts, and so positive we were about the life, I could see the Island and my fort interlaced with the fabric of normal reality. Feeling reborn, we then cruised the entire country of Switzerland in our private car, and went to Magic Wood to meet some old friends.

I spent way too much money on normal things like gas and food on the drive, but we were only trying to have fun so guilt waned quickly. It was great thing we met up with the two French compressors JuJu Nadiras, and Antoine Vandeputte, the young dun Daniel Woods, and Chris Webb-Parsons! All the way from the other side of the planet! Strong our contingent was, we celebrated the camping spirit by beer and lamplight. Yes I have gained a couple pounds of muscle, worked out a new project which is quite hard, received a silver hair (I here its a kiss from an angel), and found a new bottle of gypsy’s tears in the cold river. As I sign out on the story telling I have to say one thing.

Hopefully you can all hear me, or hear yourselves reading my words, inside your heads. I expect this, and further, have a request that you don’t say these words out loud, or even try to explain them to others as this piece is solely to be read aloud in your own minds. I know it's bullshit, I agree, but this new Mac word-processor I just downloaded which is letting me express my feelings and my madness to you all for free came with a ten page list of rules, one of these being that you aren’t aloud to share this information. It's protected by Apple, and they will come for you, I think, as they now have this new touch pad stuff and get your damn fingerprints. I clicked "agree" at the bottom of the contract of agreements, but I think its bullshit for the record, it's just like how you can’t burn songs you bought on I tunes to a CD! Lame.

In Other News: I have seen the Darjeeling limited over 15 times and I love it. Especially the line where Owen Wilson says “look at these assholes” one brother replies “that things gonna flip” Que raft flip, kids fall in water, the third brother says, “go" and they burst into action. Great scene. Amazing film, and compared to the other movies I saw: Invasion, I am Legend, Thirty days of Night, and Children of Men, it was refreshingly not too apocalyptic, even though I love that shit. I have had many dreams about waves, and big water, also amazing cities I have never seen and I have to say I am impressed. What does it all mean? Foreign planets? Interstellar travel? Who knows...

Download a mix from Dj Scallywag, they're free, and they're amazing! I really like his style, check his website. Google it and get psyched.

Try saying ZAZA when you finish your project, Klem Loskot started it all a long time ago, and it’s a worthy thing to do on occasion. Chad's bringing it back.

Adam Ondra is revolutionizing rock climbing standards, so have some respect, and be inspired!!!

Ratatat is a great group to listen to as well, check out the hip hop remixes they did which I give two thumbs up.

Closed boulder-problem-projects are the stupidest thing I have ever heard of in my life. I have been dealing with this for eight years here in Europe and I think its beyond illogical, and stifling for the progression and development of our precious bouldering areas. People closing projects for themselves, that someone else brushed, should ask themselves! WTF.

Like Bernd Zangrel, you should think about it all if you are a Pro climber. Sharing makes the world go round; we aren't in a competition here. I am all for climbers like Daniel Woods sending a couple of long time-CLOSED PROJECTS- and starting the revolution!!!

Knee pads are fine to use, so don’t let anyone tell you it's stupid or unethical. I am a firm believer they are part of the Future, and do no one harm, just protect the precious skin on top of your knee.

If you are Homeless, try the Island out. It's for people like you and me, anyone can come. Who needs a home when you’ve got one all the time! Its not a place, but a state of mind, so remember the motto, "Its not where you are going, its where you are from." Welcome to gypsy’s, nomads, and anyone else who wants to come, there is lots of room as its and imaginary, non-physical destination. Great times.

Check it out. Hardclimbs.com, it will have some updates with font movies, and look forward to MVM as always. Check out the report on the Island, the 8c boulder in font, it’s like an excerpt from this rant right here.

I would like to thanks my sponsors, 5.10, Petzl and Beal, because I am not sure if I have ever remembered to do that yet in a blog! I love you guys, you make me whole! That’s it, I’m out, wait till the next rant, and see what you think! SHIKKKADANGGGG