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32 Things Non-climbers Say to Climbers

All the things all your non-climbing friends and family have ever said to you. Enjoy!

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Is climbing cool yet? It wasn’t when I was in high school. I tried not to tell people I was into it because I knew other kids just wouldn’t get it, and that was fine. Climbing may be in the Olympics, but it’s far from being well-understood. Even as an adult, I brace myself for a slew of—let’s face it—dumb comments and questions. You can’t get mad or annoyed at someone for not understanding something obscure, but a younger me, among other things, told a hiker in Estes that my crashpad was a giant tree bandage. 

Without further ado, here are all the things your friends and family have ever said upon learning that you do “that climbing thing.” 

A Reluctant Free Soloist Rescued On Her Lucky Day

  1. Bruh, have you seen Free Solo?
  2. Oh you climb? That’s cool. I’m also into hiking.
  3. So, for comps, it is just who gets to the top the fastest?
  4. You’re a real life Spiderman!
  5. Bruh, have you seen the Dawn Wall?
  6. Have you done Everest?
  7. So, what’s that thing on your back? [gestures at crash pad]
  8. Wow! I couldn’t do that. I can barely climb out of bed in the morning. [laughs to him or herself]
  9. How high do you go?
  10. Bruh, have you seen the City Bank commercial?
  11. Like, do you need oxygen?
  12. I’d try it, but I’m afraid of heights.
  13. Why don’t you wear gloves?
  14. What are those clippy things?
  15. I’ve got a harness too…
  16. Bruh, did you watch the Olympics?
  17. How long are you planning on camping out there? [gestures to crash pad]
  18. Make sure you don’t fall!
  19. I’m more of a two-feet-on-the-ground kind of guy.
  20. So, you planning on doing 14ers?
  21. Sports climbing is so cool.
  22. So, how do you poop up there?
  23. That’s a big backpack! [gestures to crash pad]
  24. You know, you could just walk up on the back side. It’s way easier.
  25. You must have a lot of upper body strength.
  26. How do the ropes get up there?
  27. Do you have military training?
  28. Have you ever free-handed?
  29. Are you still climbing?
  30. You put your feet in those?
  31. You climb? Your IG profile must be sick!
  32. Were you in the boy scouts?

These are the Funniest Climbing Clips We’ve Ever Seen